Tag Archives: paranoia
“SHEEPS AS WOLVES”
In the hidden depths of the woods, a thought lingers:
“If wolves can disguise in sheep’s clothing, could sheep wear the wolf’s guise?”
In the tangled maze of secrets, where truth blurs,
Do gentle sheep cloak themselves in the wolf’s shadow?
Or does only the wolf, in its solitary prowls,
Embrace the sheep’s guise, to set the prey in a deceitful array?
Oh, inquirer of mysteries, amidst the predators howls lies the prey in disguise.
Reflect upon this notion, where the dreadful seems harmless.
wolves among the fold? Or Sheep as wolves
In the enigma of life, stories untold.
PAINFUL GRATITUDE
Dear society,
you’ve crippled my words, tied down my speech, and burnt down my license.
you’ve slapped my dignity, questioned my honesty, and drowned my happiness in a pool of tears and anxiety.
Dear society… I’m surprised…
my jaws dropped down in shock,
cold hands, cold feets in fear,
my smile, my laughter unreal,
dark nights I faced, silent screams i heard in echoes.
Dear society,
yes, you broke me, but thankfully, left pieces, hoping i would decrease, but those were bridges, a treatment to my bruises.
so dear society…. thank you…..
For building a stronger version of me.
From Nowhere
At this point, I’m not sure what to write about anymore. I’ve been battered, shattered, scattered… Life has been rough, tough, cruel with no fuel to carry me on.
My dreams, my passion, my zeal all lost to the the hands of inconsistency but this non-chalancy isn’t derived from the lack of will, not from the lack of inspiration, cause every experience comes with a dozen paragraphs package painted with pain prescribed to every word printed out, to every drop of ink flowing out from the pen that never runs dry….. Or so I said…..
This pen harbours stories wanting to be told so badly but lacks an initiating point, a prologue to sentences crafted from sincerity. So it stays pregnant with thousands of untold stories until it can’t contain no more, so i start from nowhere, hoping to get to somewhere, hoping to be heard, hoping you would decipher…..
H.M.B.P
With each step i take, i hope to get to the finish line to this dark tunnel of paranoia…
But each step seems to take me a mile backwards.
A magnetic pain I can’t seem to distance from.
lost confidence, plot twists i fail to understand.
I love happy endings, but this story’s “in media res” technique makes it look more like an advanced tragedy.
My pen wonders if its abandoned…
but the truth is i don’t wanna burn papers with brutality.
sorrounded by people but pain seems like my only home.
if time heals tell me why my clock is at a stand still.
healing never ends so I’ve learnt to find comfort and make a home in my brutal pain.
“THE TRIO”
I am “me”, my mind and my heart
“me” in two voices
my mind and me
my heart and me
it’s always a struggle
which should I listen to??
my mind thinks straight, cuz obviously……..
my heart thinks deep……
i need to loose one to have “me”
loose my mind or my heart
“me” is confused
i want to listen to my heart, but i hate listening to my mind say “i warned you” Everytime i come crying back.
i don’t wanna go from ” me” to an foreign island of crowded emotions.
my heart always entices me, scoring points, breaking
“me” to pieces at the end.
i hate the fact that my heart is always right
my mind thinks straight.
my heart thinks deep.
it’s “me”, my mind, and my heart
and it’s still a struggle…….
“GREY LAVA”
Time heals they say…
but memories remind and scars remain
difficult to move on with a smile,
ignorance and denial to the heart,
walking through life after an eruption and putting on an act of strength and neutrality when deep down a hole dug and hot lava spilling out…
but Time they say heals…
the liquid within cooling down as the clock ticks, and poetry giving remedy to the soul.
This creates a chance for hope, a chance to smile genuinely again.
A chance to step on “grey lava”
LOST DREAMS
If only things could be more clearer.
a broad explanation to these tears.
cause this time even my fears have been dethroned to a Lower tier of my pain.
betraying every last statement written down on this hearts manifesto.
with this mind working under a government overtaken by a coup, its a dictatorship, such a conundrum.
breathing, but just not living…
dating back to the uncivilized days before sir lord lugard freed us from the shackles of shattered dreams.
yet till this day i still can’t put together the pieces.
its like a puzzle, only that the pieces of mine seems to be lost in an ocean of apathetic passion.
GLIMPSE FROM GUTS
The light visible at the end of each shadowed pipe.
The ending that seems unreal but takes reality on an unusual surprise.
The confidence you think is void but suddenly shows up.
The hope that comes with the desire to fight. The desire to hang tight and not give up.
The rage and anger that results in a fight against ugly situations that seem to cripple and cut short the beautiful smiles.
The positive “maybe” and “hopefully” that stands in front of each sentences spreading toxic fumes that neutralizes the fear within. dark shadows in darkness.
who dares for a smile?
prohibited words…. joy
atrocity? no! i dare
This is glimpse from guts.
I WRITE, I WISH I ACT
i write…..
they say with passion
with words that comes alive within each line with words that roar out truth
with twisted feelings, retwisted but still understood within those unseen lines.
I write….
they say with raw words
unfiltered and so much relatable
with words surprisingly consoling your bottled feelings
I write…….
words I wish would console my own bottled feelings
I write, I wish I act
touching terms torturing souls triggering pain
I wish I could be at the receiving end absorb and be consoled
I write to mend your soul not necessarily mine
I mend, I wish, I self console
I write, I wish I act
FEEL
I feel the deepest of regrets in the most memorable way
I feel the deepest of sadness in the most pleasurable way…
foresight becoming memorable insights.
never forgotten, never erased.
aftermaths of a bleeding love, painful pleasure…..
perfect play played perfectly…
when reality comes knocking,
fantasies become impossible occurrences blown into the wind.
I feel grief in love from a bleeding heart.
sanity threatening reality from a bleeding soul.
regrets worth experiencing one more time and maybe again……
I feel tortured love
this is reality worth escaping from……
WITH EACH BREATH
everyday I open up my eyes and discovered that dreams and reality just don’t get along too well
but the truth is undeniable and regardless wishes aren’t horses
I breathe in and out a thought repeatedly. close my eyes and all I see is a reoccurring trail of plain wishes as impossible as a wet rock under the sun
and I could never settle for a defeat
cuz these exhales speaks truth in unspoken words only audible to us
with every breath I wish…..
unspeakable feelings sense within
and every time I look into the waters
I see a reflection of reality worth turning to dreams
or rather….. dreams worth turning into reality with each breath I take in, it’s an impossible plain wish.
BLEEDING LOVE
they said love doesn’t hurt
they said all good things about love
a word so complicated
a four letter word that forms a forum of complications
a love that cuts so deep
a love that hurts so bad
it’s love anyways but it’s different
it’s an experiencial emotional torture
but you keep yearning for more
oh! sweet pain
clearly piercing through but you embrace the pain and hope for a better tomorrow
and “uncertain tomorrow”
and though joy comes in the morning
sunrises day by day
but you keep waiting for the morning everything will seem just fine
it’s A Love so pure
but it’s a bleeding Love.
Left to ponder 1
Left to ponder
Lonely in my room
And deep within because of the thoughts that broke my mind
It's as if I have lived this world before I was born
It's as if I was a god, now in a human body.
So I wonder why,
Why I was left to tremble
Why I was left with many unanswerd questions.
Why I was left on the undiscovered part of the mystery.
Am I living the right life?
Am I on the destined track?
These are constant pop up questions in my head, as am constantly left to ponder.
